“Oh, I definitely wouldn’t recommend meditation for someone with your profile,” she said matter-of-factly. I gained a new perspective when one day I shared with my therapist that meditation has been such a struggle for me. Despite the assurances of meditation evangelists that I just needed to stick with it and that feeling like I was failing was part of the process, I suspected that maybe meditation wasn’t for me.

At the end of each effort, I felt drained from the failure and worn out by the attempt. I felt a profound sense of dissonance, my mind bubbling like it was coming to a boil, trapped inside a body that was desperately trying to hold still. When I was anxious, meditation actually increased my agitation. But I noticed this only seemed to happen when I was already calm. At its best, it felt like I was floating in the ocean, bobbing on waves of pure consciousness. I focused on my breath (until I began to hyperventilate), and I also imagined my thoughts floating away in little clouds (there were a lot of clouds).Īnd to be fair, I went through a period of a couple of months when I had some success with it. I tried sitting, which made me uncomfortable, and then lying down, which made me fall asleep. I tried body scan meditations and mindfulness meditations.

It is one of the most studied non-pharmacologic mental health interventions in the world, and most of the data is overwhelmingly positive.Īt its best, meditation felt like I was floating in the ocean. Avid meditators won’t hesitate to point out, breathlessly, that it can actually change your brain. Meditation promotes calm and compassion, decreases stress, and improves attention and concentration. After all, meditation is hailed as an almost magical cure in self-help circles, and the list of benefits it offers is undeniably impressive.

It’s a simple fact that often feels like a confession. This post is part of TED’s “How to Be a Better Human” series, each of which contains a piece of helpful advice from people in the TED community browse through all the posts here.

Joyful fetell lee